Learning The Hard Way. How I came back to Jesus.
This is my answer to "Why are you Christian?"
The one question a lot of Christians are scared to answer "Why are you Christian?" For the longest time, I didn't have an answer to this question. I grew up in a Christian household. Went to church on Sunday and Wednesday, went to church camp, and got saved at a fairly young age as well as baptized. We very rarely skipped church if at all. I never really questioned anything about my relationship with God or anything. I just kind of believed. Then my parents got divorced. I still believed, but I wondered why this had to happen. Then my mom got remarried to the wonderful man I now call my dad that also adopted us. I gained a bit more hope at that moment and God felt so real again, everything was ok. Then my Biological Father comes back into my life and decides he wants to be a father again. Everything is still going fine. A few years later my biological father sends my mom a letter... He decides he doesn't want to be a dad anymore. I began to slowly lose hope and throughout high school, I was serving on the praise team and in the children's church. Things like that and I was just kind of stagnant. I didn't believe in the things I did. I was still trying to find a place in life. I then started to explore other beliefs and discovered Satanism. To be honest, this filled my heart for a little bit, but one thing I realize now is it filled my heart with so much darkness. I was so depressed and dealt with anxiety. Then it came time to choose colleges my senior year. I had pretty much given up Satanism at this point and just kind of identified as an atheist. I was in between four separate colleges; Harding University, Arkansas Tech, Oklahoma Christian, and Ouachita Baptist. I applied for all four and ended up going with Arkansas Tech at first. Then an advisor from Harding reaches out and tells me they want me at their school. I hadn't applied for any scholarships and I wasn't interested in Harding. It was a Church of Christ University and I was not in any way Church of Christ. The worship was different and personally just didn't like it when I came for what they call Bison Bound. I had come to Bison Bound and honestly really enjoyed it other than the worship aspect, but I could get over that. I was decided. I started attending Harding University in the fall of 2021 and what a difference it made. I was still spiritually stagnant but I was finally involved in a good Christ worshiping culture. I ended up joining a social club and slowly started to believe. I still had questions and just was so unsure still. Then the spring semester happened. I started serving the Lord more. I went on a mission trip, started worshipping, got into the church, and started asking the questions I had to my girlfriend's dad (I also met my girlfriend in the fall). My girlfriend's dad is a preacher and he was able to help get me the answers that I was wanting. I was still living in sin, but I had something to hold onto. Then it happened... I was walking with my girlfriend on a sidewalk and these two cars come speeding down the street we were walking on. They were going at least 90 MPH, or so it seemed. Well, my life flashed before my eyes because If one of those cars would have spun out I would not be sitting here writing this testimony today. It was at that moment I realized I need to get back to being the Christian I need to be. I needed to do it for myself, but also my girlfriend, and to be a good example for her, but also other people. I was just so shaken from that moment. I started praying again and believing. I was also only listening to worship music during this time. It was almost like I was observing the Pentecost Lent, but not really. I then decided to become baptized in the place where I truly found God. I was so on fire for God and just wanted to serve him with all of my beings. One of my club buddies baptized me and I finally started living for God again. Now I sit here almost a sophomore in college. I believe in God again and I pretty much just live for him because it is the best thing for me to do. This has been my story and I am so lucky to be able to share it with you guys! God is real and sometimes it takes a scare to truly realize God's love for you.